Two cannibals are debating whether it's worse to eat Liberals or Conservatives.

The first cannibal says:

Last time I ate a Conservative I had indigestion for 2 days.  
He had crusty exterior, that matched his personality.
His arms & legs were stringy like a elephants hide, 
and he had callouses on his hands and feet that were like a donkey's hoofs.
There wans't a single tender spot on him.  
I knew I was going to have to cook him a long time, you know... 

I remember right before I tossed him into the kettle, he said a few things to me. 

He said he was a Conservative and didn't want to die. 
He knew he would provide some nourishment for the tribe.
He said I have one last thing to say ...


The second cannibal interrupted him saying:

Ahh that's nothing!

Last time I tred to eat a Liberal I was sick for a week!
He had all these nice words about equality, and charity, and service.
He tried to convince me that we were all the same under the skin, but I knew better.
He grabbed a gun but didn't know how to hold it; then he cowered like a possom.
He was all flabby and soft, as though he never worked a day in his life.
I thought I would be able to cook nim quickly, and that he'd be, you know easy to chew...

I remember right before I tossed him into the kettle, he said a few things to me. 

He said he was a Liberal and he didn't want to die either.
He asked if this was attonement for the crimes of his ancestors.
Then he got scared and said I would die if I ate him because he had mad cow disease.
Then he got really scared and trued to curse me and my family.

I tossed the Liberal into the pot wigh some herbs.
For a moment I thought he spoke the truth, because as soon as he hit the hot water,
his head split open and there was no brain in his skull.

As soon as a I stirred the pot he split open and I knew the soup was ruined!
And again I thought he spoke the truth because I thought the kettle was ruined too!
It took me a week to clean up the mess he made. 
I had to dump him out and clean the pot of all the residue...

When the first cannibal interrupted back, with:

Yeah! I know that's the last thing the Conservative said.
He said: "Liberals are full of shit."

(c) 2009 CTYankee